Under Construction Lakeside 2k13

 "I am sure that God Who began the good work in you will keep on working in you until the day Jesus Christ comes again." Philippians 1:6

So what does the above verse mean? We are all under construction. None of us are perfect, and we will never be perfect. God is constantly working in us, around us, and through us.

This summer I was blessed to once again spend 3 weeks at Lakeside. If you know anything about Lakeside, you know that it is a very peaceful community. Once you enter through the gate you can feel the presence of God. Just because you are at Lakeside does not mean that satan is not going to try and attack you. That is the complete opposite. The closer you are to Christ, the harder satan is going to try and attack you. Let me just say that satan was attacking me the entire time I was at camp.

During the first week I struggled to know where my place was. I haven't been a camper in 5 years and this was my first year as a senior counselor. After attending camp for 12 years, I finally got to be a senior counselor!  One thing that I learned was that I do not like the fact that I am getting older. I wish I could stay young forever. I also do not like change. I will avoid it at all costs. 

The first week of camp I was busy 90% of the time. The 10% that I was not busy, I was exhausted. I was exhausted physically, mentally, and spiritually. Because I was constantly on the go I had a hard time hearing from God. There were times when I was angry at God because the kids in my youth group and my friends were having these awesome God moments and I couldn't even "hear" from God. Before coming to camp I honestly thought things were going pretty well in my life. I was a generally happy person, and I tried to spend time with God on the daily. During camp though, God continued to point out many areas of my life that were just mediocre, things that I could improve on to better my relationship with God. I remember falling asleep one night in my room just crying out to God. The phrase that came to my mind repeatedly was "pruning is painful but it is often necessary!" If we want to grow in our relationship and walk with Christ, then we have to get rid of the things in our lives that are holding us back from getting closer to Christ.

During the first 2 weeks of camp our chaplain told us that the Bible is more than just a road map that we should be using to navigate through life. The Bible is a love letter from Father. I loved how Bobby kept referring to God as Father. For those of us that grew up without a loving father, that can be a hard concept to understand, but God is the ultimate Father, and He's a Father to the fatherless. We learned that sometimes we play "peek-a-boo" with God. We don't want Him to see everything that we have done, but of course He knows everything we say and sees everything we do. The enemy wants us to doubt God's goodness. When we hide from God, we begin to push people away. 

What does it mean to live in grace? "Grace space" is the ability to say to someone else "I got you". As human beings we hurt each other, but Jesus never hurts us. Grace is filling in the gap when I cannot do it! Grace is Jesus. Grace does not make people sin, but it's important that we extend grace to others. This is an area of my life that God pointed out that I need to work on. I realize that no one is perfect, but sometimes I have a hard time forgiving others. Never ponder in private what people tell you in public. 

For Junior High Lakeside we have a great group of CIT's who for the past 10 months leading up to camp have put many hours into planning junior high lakeside. Over the past 2 years we've all gotten pretty close, so close that we consider each other more than just friends, we consider each other family. The first day of camp satan was really attacking us! He knew how much we all love God, love working with each other,and junior high lakeside in general. After much prayer and a late night trip to wal-mart, things were running much smoother the next morning.I am beyond blessed to have been able to work with such an awesome group of people last week. Things have definitely changed since last year for all of us. None of us are in the same place that we were in once we left camp last year. Things are a lot different but  I love you guys so much and no matter where life takes each one of us, we will always be friends. God brought each of you into my life at just the right time. Let's continue to lift each other up in prayer as we all know that life is a journey full of ups and downs. When things get tough this year lets first remember to lean on God, but lets also remember that we are a family, so lets lean on one another to make it through the hard times.

Fearfully and wonderfully made

Can I say something to all the ladies out there that might be reading this? Ladies, you are all fearfully and wonderfully made! The Bible says so in Psalms 139:14. "I praise You because I am fearfully and wonderfully made."
Ladies, you are royalty, and you are woman of the most High! Ephesians 2:10 says " For we are God's masterpiece. He has created us anew in Christ, Jesus, so we can do the good things he planned for us long ago."
You are so beautiful and God loves you sooooo much! You are 100%  special and unique. God created you the way you are for a purpose.

We all have insecurities, but when we let them get the best of us who has the power? Satan does. We can't continue to let satan play off our insecurities. I am so thankful that God does not see me the way that I see myself. I'm sure we've all picked up a magazine and thought to ourselves "Wow! I wished I looked just like her! I wish I was prettier, skinnier, taller, more athletic", and the list goes on and on. Let me repeat myself and say that God created you the way that you are for a reason. You are unique and there is not another person in this world that is exactly the same as you. Isn't that so cool? Let's be real, the girls in most of the magazines that we have all read and looked at have been photo shopped and tweaked. In real life they probably look similar to you and I. They are probably a few pounds heavier than what they would like us to all believe, and their makeup has probably been airbrushed. I'm sure we would all look just as good as them if we could have someone professionally do our hair and make up each morning before we headed out to start our day. TRUE BEAUTY comeshttp://youtu.be/-ks3R2BwyO0 from within. Don't let the world's standards bring you down or make you feel bad about yourself. "But, the Lord said to Samuel, 'Do not consider his appearance or his height, for I have rejected him. The Lord does not look at the things man look at. Man looks at the outward appearance, but the Lord looks at the heart' 1 Samuel 16:7

For so long I had been believing the lie. I thought that I wasn't good enough. I thought I wasn't skinny enough, pretty enough, tall enough, tan enough, or athletic enough. God made me the way that I am for a reason and He thinks I am absolutely beautiful and to die for! (Literally) Do I like what I see in the mirror everyday? No. But even on my "ugly" days as I like to call them, God sees a beautiful masterpiece. We have got to stop comparing ourselves to other people because in the end it will only leave us empty. We will never be JUST like someone else. I think if we continue to compare ourselves to other people and we always want to be prettier, skinnier, smarter etc, then we are taking the focus off of God and putting it on ourselves and others. We don't need more people walking around trying to be a savior. We need a SAVIOR and His name is JESUS!

You don't have to be perfect! God is not mad at you....He's madly in love with you!

Ladies, You got the power because of Christ!

"God created man in His own image, in the image of God He created him; male and female He created them" Genesis 1:27

Matthew 5:14 We are the Light Of the World...

Matthew 5:14 "  ¹⁴ "You are the light of the world. A city on a hill can't be hidden."

I've been back from Lakeside since Friday and I've been contemplating what I should even type. God is so good and I experienced so much in just 3 weeks! So may the words that I type not be from myself but be what God wants me to share with anyone who may end up reading this.

Two weeks before Lakeside I was so stressed out about camp. I was a nervous wreck about junior high lakeside and things just weren't going my way. The weekend before Lakeside I went on Chrysalis and I spent a lot of time in prayer there about camp. When I came home from Chrysalis, with just a week before Lakeside, I was at peace with camp. I was not nervous or stressed and I knew that God was in control.

I knew that this year Lakeside would be a little bit different, but that it would be ok. God was going to move in mighty ways, just like He does every year! On Sunday during our Cridersville CIT meeting, Jeff asked us to think about what our purpose was for the week. Normally I struggle with what my purpose is for the week, but by Monday night I figured it out. In the past 4 years since I've been a CIT my purpose has always been to serve the camp as a whole. Something was different this year, and I realized that my purpose was to serve my youth group, get to know the teens in our group better, and step up and be a leader.

Our theme for this year was formed out of a tragedy. One of the camp's CIT's was killed in a car accident back in November. We know that God has a plan and during that time we learned that we truly are a family! I am so blessed to be a part of this Lakeside family. Camp was different without her and it just didn't feel right with her not being there. I cried during "a year in review", "revelation song", and when they played her "hallelujah" video one last time during week 1. During week 2 I couldn't help but smile during "Revelation song" because I knew that she was in Heaven singing at the top of her lungs and dancing. She was praising Jesus just like she'd always wanted to do, face to face with the one who gave her life.


During chaplain's hour throughout the week we learned that:
~Light is different than darkness
~It's warmer than darkness
~It's brighter than darkness


A city is:
1.) A place of refuge
2.) A beacon of light in the darkness
3.) A place for the church to act as it was intended.


We can be light and Hope.
1.) it's not about the right answers, its about the hope (1Peter 3:15)
2.) Its not about you, it's about others
3.) It's not about your glory, it's about His glory


3 Keys to a healthy relationship with God:
1.)Faith is essential (John 20:29)
2.)Time is crucial (Nehmiah 8:10)
3.) True Love is modeled. (Zephaniah 3)


*What you believe will affect how you act
*God loves each one of us as if there were only one of us
*God simply loves you
*It all comes back to the simple fact that PEOPLE ARE WATCHING!


*It's time to grow up.....
1.) When you demand your own way
2.) When you want what you want no matter the consequences
3.)When you can not admit you need to change


*Guys, if you aren't ready to lay down your life for someone, then don't play the role of a husband
*My past mistakes do not define me or disqualify me, but I have to move forward
*If God is for you, who can be against you?
*What we do right now in life will echo in eternity


During devos on Thursday night of week 1 I got a cold dose of reality. I realized just how hard satan is working against the lives of the students in my own youth group. I know that I have my own problems and issues that I'm working on, but if i could take away the pain, hurt, tears, and fears that the teens in my youth group have felt I would. I don't like to see anyone hurting, and that night just made me realize that I'm doing the right thing in still being as involved as I am in youth ministry. Thursday night I also let go of the things that were holding me back from my own relationship with God. I missed devos with my group that night because I was leading the prayer path, but when I got back I was given the opportunity to write down things on a rock that were holding me back with my relationship with God. I walked down to the pier with Josh and some of our CIT's. After tossing my rock in the lake, I just sat on the pier and prayed. I didn't sleep a lot that night after hearing what the kids in my youth group were dealing with. Needless to say I was soo angry with satan.


Week 2 was nothing short of awesome as well. The camp was a lot smaller but God was working on changing hearts. For some reason God always works in a mighty mighty way on Thursday night! Thursday night during praise and worship several teens gave their lives to Christ for the first time!! Many more teens also re-dedicated their lives to Christ that night! Earlier in the week during devos we also shared the things that were holding us back from our relationship with God. Once again, listening to everyone's burdens, struggles, fears, tears, and pain made my heart ache.  I've realized that I tend to take on the burdens and pain that others are feeling (and that isn't necessarily a good thing)


I was blessed when one of the girls at my table trusted me enough to open up  to me. She even asked me to be her accountability partner.  During that week I really realized that it really does come down to PEOPLE ARE WATCHING US! As Christians we need to be setting the example and living like Christ. Obviously none of us will ever lead a sinless life, but we can sin less.


I'm not going to sit here and act as if I was not scared to death of junior high lakeside, but the truth is I was terrified. Yes, after 6 years of being a counselor at junior high lakeside, I was terrified and I don't know why. But don't get me wrong, I had an AMAZING week and an AMAZING experience, and I would not take any of it back!! From the moment I arrived at junior high lakeside I felt as if satan was attacking me. I don't know what my deal was. Maybe lack of sleep from the previous 2 weeks, and I just really wanted senior high lakeside back.


Despite my tiredness and grumpiness, God showed up in a big way!! My favorite moment from junior high lakeside, and probably all 3 weeks, would have to be when one of the boys that I brought with me from my youth group accepted Christ into his heart for the very first time!! The coolest part about that was that there was not even an altar call when that happened. I just can not get over how absolutely amazing God is!! He continues to blow my mind every day! 

During Junior High lakeside God  placed a handful of special people in my life. I am truly blessed to have been able to serve with such an amazing group of CIT's.  You lifted me up during the week. You kept me going when I was so sleep deprived and all I wanted to do was crawl back into bed, when all I wanted to do was complain because I was hungry, you made me laugh (and sometimes to the point of tears), you prayed for me, and gave me encouraging words when I needed to hear them. We may have only been together for less than a week but I am honored and blessed to have served alongside each of you. I think of each one of you as family now! I love each one of you and I am praying for each of you. Remember people are watching how you live your life. Be an example and a light! WE ARE.....

Dear Future Husband

Dear Future Husband,

I can not wait to meet you! I often wonder who you are and if you are someone in my life right now, or someone I have yet to meet. I want you to know that no matter where you are, I'm praying for you. I'd love to know how God is going to bring us together,but I guess we'll both just have to wait.

I want you to know that I will always love you, but I'll love Jesus more than I love you! haha Jesus will always be first in my life. I will be honest with you and love you for who are.....the person God created you to be. I will accept you for who you are and I won't try to change you.

I can not wait to meet you,to start a friendship with you and a relationship, to meet your family,to see and hear what God is doing in your life, to start a family with you, to learn from you, to strengthen my relationship with Jesus(because I know you), and to grow old with you!

I want you to know that next to Jesus, the Backstreet Boys were my first love, so I hope you're ok with that, and sometimes I do bust out singing a lil of "I want it that way"! I love Taylor Swift, so I hope you're ok with singing her songs with me in the car. I've always wanted to adopt, so I hope that your "down" for that. God put adoption on my heart when I was younger, but of course I want children of our own as well. Most of all I just want to serve our incredible and awesome God with you!

In all seriousness though, I can not wait for the day that God brings us into each other's lives.  I am so excited for our future together.   I cannot wait for all that God is going to teach me about what true love is through you. So know tonight when your head hits that pillow, God loves you, and so do I. This is a promise I make to you today.
Love, Courtney=)

⁴ Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. ⁵ It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. ⁶ Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. ⁷ It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres.
⁸ Love never fails. But where there are prophecies, they will cease; where there are tongues, they will be stilled; where there is knowledge, it will pass away. ⁹ For we know in part and we prophesy in part, ¹⁰ but when completeness comes, what is in part disappears. ¹¹ When I was a child, I talked like a child, I thought like a child, I reasoned like a child. When I became a man, I put the ways of childhood behind me. ¹² For now we see only a reflection as in a mirror; then we shall see face to face. Now I know in part; then I shall know fully, even as I am fully known.
¹³ And now these three remain: faith, hope and love. But the greatest of these is love.
1 Corinthians 13:4-13

Dear Pretty Girls

Dear Courtney (or insert YOUR name here) :)

I made YOU and you are different. You are unique. With LOVE I formed you  in yourmother's womb. With LOVE I fashioned you with great joy. I remember with great pleasure the day I created you.

I LOVE your smile. I LOVE your ways. I LOVE to hear you laugh and the silly things you do and say. You brings Me great pleasure. This is how I made you. 

I made you pretty, but not perfect, because I know your heart, and that you could be vain. I wanted you to search out your heart and to learn that it would be Me in you that would make you beautiful and it would be Me in you that would draw friends to you.

I made you in such a way at you would need Me. I made you a little more lonesome than you would like to be, only because I need you to lean and depend on Me. I know your heart, I know if I had not made you like this,you would go your own chosen way and forget Me, your Creator.

I have given you many good and happy things  because I love you.  

Because I love you I have seen you broken, hurt and I've seen the tears you have cried alone. I have cried them with you, and had a broken heart, too.  

I have to reshape and remold you, and  renew to what I had planned for you to be. It has not been easy for you or Me. 

I want you to be conformed to My image. This goal I have set for you  because I LOVE YOU!

Love,

Your Prince Jesus :)

I don't care what the world throws at me.....It's gonna be okay

So Summer officially ends for me in a few weeks when school starts(even though it already feels like it has ended) It's been a great summer. Probobly the best summer I've had in the past few years. I got to spend three weeks at Lakeside, a week in Nashville for an urban mission trip, Kings Island with my youth group, a Red's game, the fair, and a Hillsong United concert.  I've also gotten to spend time with friends I hadn't seen in a while.

I can honestly say that I have grown so much within the last 90 days or so.  It's safe to say that I am not the same Courtney I was at the beginning of summer.Looking back at some of my pictures from the beginning of the summer I don't recognize the girl staring back at me... that is me.  I've grown up a lot(even if some of you can't see it).  I questioned my faith a lot at the beginning of the summer, but I've pushed through all that.  I know who I am as a person and as a Christian, I am a daughter of the Most High, Jesus Christ!!  Although I'm a Christian I do make mistakes....lot's of them, and I'm not perfect!  However, the only person I have to answer to is God.

I feel like lately I've been under "attack" again for being a Christian.  Never will I be ashamed of my Savior.  My Savior loved me enough to go to the cross and die for me! So the least I can do is live for HIM!

In Sunday School last week we talked about loving our enemies.  I suppose that's something I'm struggling with right now.  I mean c'mon how do you be nice to someone who talks bad about you and drags your name through the mud? Being nice to that person is easier said than done when you're faced with that situation.  But the thing is we are called to love everyone.  It's hard to wanna be nice to someone who isn't nice to you.

Here's what the Bible has to say about being persecuted....
“If you were of the world, the world would love its own. Yet because you are not of the world, but I chose you out of the world, therefore the world hates you…. If they persecuted Me they will persecute you… for they do not know the One who sent Me.” John 15:19-21

Matthew 5:10-12 “Blessed are those who have been persecuted for the sake of righteousness, for theirs is the kingdom of heaven. 11″Blessed are you when men cast insults at you, and persecute you, and say all kinds of evil against you falsely, on account of Me. 12″Rejoice, and be glad, for your reward in heaven is great, for so they persecuted the prophets who were before you.

Matthew 5:44 “But I say to you, love your enemies, and pray for those who persecute you


Yeah the last one is hard to do! At times it's really hard to pray for someone who has either talked bad about you, or hurt you in some way, but as Christians we (myself included) need to remember that we need to pray for those people.  Prayer really does have the ability to change a person's heart.  And a lot of the time, there is something going on in that person's life that has caused them to behave in that manor towards you. 

While talking about "love" during Sunday School over the last few weeks, it's easy for me to say that "I love everyone" but I just don't always "like" some people.  After reading 1Corinthians13, my opinion of me saying that "I love everyone" has changed.

1 Corinthians 13

¹ If I speak in the tongues^[a] of men or of angels, but do not have love, I am only a resounding gong or a clanging cymbal. ² If I have the gift of prophecy and can fathom all mysteries and all knowledge, and if I have a faith that can move mountains, but do not have love, I am nothing. ³ If I give all I possess to the poor and give over my body to hardship that I may boast,^[b] but do not have love, I gain nothing.
⁴ Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. ⁵ It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. ⁶ Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. ⁷ It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres.


Now re-read vs 4-7 inserting your name
Courtney is patient, Courtney is kind.  Courtney does not envy, Courtney does not boast, Courtney is not proud.  Courtney does not dishonor others, Courtney is not self-seeking, Courtney is not easily angered, Courtney keeps no record of wrongs.  Courtney does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth.  Courtney always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres.

Ok wow!! That was an eye opener because I know do not always display these charectoristics of LOVE

Father God, I pray that you would make me a more loving person.  Allow me to see people the way that you see them.  Lord help me to forgive others and to be slow to anger. Help me to be a light that shines for you, even in the darkest of places.  Father God I pray that you would continue to guide my footsteps and show me what's next.In Jesus' name I pray, Amen

I hope you dance

When i meditated on the word GUIDANCE, I kept seeing "dance" at the end of the word.I remember reading that doing God's will is a lot like dancing.When 2 people try to lead,nothing feels right.The movement doesnt flow with the music,and everything is quite uncomfortable and jerky.When one person realizes that,and lets the other lead,both bodies begin to flow with the music.

One gives gentle cues,perhaps with a nudge to the back or by pressing lightly in one direction or another.it's as if two become one body,moving beautifully.The dance takes surrender,willingness,and attentiveness from one person and gentle guidance and skill from the other...

My eyes drew back to the word GUIDANCE. When I saw "G" I thought of God, followed by "u" and "I." "God, "U" and "I" dance." .......God, you and I dance. As I lowered my head, i became willing to trust that I would get guidance about my life. once again, i became willing to let God lead. My prayer for you today is that God's blessings and mercies be upon you on this day and everyday. May you abide in God as God abides in you. Dance together with God, trusting God to lead and to guide you through each season of your life........I HOPE YOU DANCE!!!!!

http://youtu.be/RV-Z1YwaOiw